Link Love and Quick Thoughts...
Things have been pretty busy this week, hence the lack of posts. However, I'm not one to leave all of you totally without reading material, so here's a list of interesting stuff:
1) The 41st edition of the Skeptics' Circle.
2) Carmel with an excellent (and funny as hell) way to get rid of unwanted redneck male attention.
3) If you've ever asked "Why Ren?", Maggie Rosethorn has the answer.
4) Most of us have probably seen this picture already, but it's so good I have to point to it anyway.
5) Rev. BigDumbChimp's cute furry dog has officially earned the moniker "Vlad the Destroyer". Here's why...
6) Ahistoricality has a short collection of interesting quotes.
7) The Anonymous Coward has some thoughts on marriage that are worth reading.
... And now the quick thoughts:
It's tough being a nice guy sometimes... and expensive. The problem with having a few friends that dance to pay their way through school rears its ugly head in a big way when you stop in to say hi. You see, as someone who has at least a small understanding of how hard their job actually is (nasty friction burns behind the knee from the pole are the least of their problems), it's tough to stop in for a minute on a slow night and see that they're not raking in the tips like they would be on a normal night. The problem is that, paying customers or not, they don't get to just sit around and wait for people to show up... they have to dance with or without an audience.
Seeing that makes me feel a little guilty for just being there to say hello. I don't like to see people work themselves into exhaustion for nothing.
Unfortunately, the only way to help your friends out in that situation is to throw them a few bills for the effort.
Oh: and it sucks when you close down a bar early and mid-cleanup you toss an empty bottle into the garbage where it strikes another bottle just perfectly corner to corner... and they both explode into hundreds of razor-sharp pieces.
... And you're wearing flip-flops.
37 Package(s) of Returned Poo:
Yes, I too hate it when I have to visit those places.....
I bet you do...
Never visted one of those places, personally. I had a brief experience with that sort of dancing, in a not-for-a-living, only-for-fun kind of way. The audiences were by and large dykes, and it was a lot of fun. Until the one time I danced for a straight man. After that I never danced again. Straight men are entitled assholes. I can't imagine needing to do it for a living.
Oh: and it sucks when you close down a bar early and mid-cleanup you toss an empty bottle into the garbage where it strikes another bottle just perfectly corner to corner... and they both explode into hundreds of razor-sharp pieces.
Several years ago I was standing in the kitchen, chatting with my roommate, who was doing dishes. A glass he was in the process of washing flew out of his hand at high velocity (not entirely sure how) and hit the rim of a plate that was standing in the drying rack. There was a loud crash, a fraction of a second when the air was full of flying shards of glass, and then complete stillness.
Thanks for the love, Matt. I need a lesson on how to do that; still haven't figured out how to put links on my blogs...
Never went to one of those places but I've always wanted to. Need to get back to work on my "things I want to do before I die" list.
I was never much of a gentleman's club type of guy before I ended up being put to work at the door by an old friend who worked there. I guess I'm still not much into it but some of the girls who are my friends work so often that I rarely see them anywhere else. I try to put in an appearance about once a month if possible. I also don't mind occasionally taking a friend who's having a bad day and buying them a dance to cheer them up.
Maggie, if you need to you can email me with whatever trouble you're having with links and I can give you a short walkthrough.
Well at the risk of sounding odd, my wife enjoys going as much as I do. We don't go often but when we do it's always fun.
I also don't mind occasionally taking a friend who's having a bad day and buying them a dance to cheer them up.
Like I said: straight men are entitled assholes.
Here I would have to reveal a weakness-it would be hard for me to have friends who dance and go see them writhing around with their clothes off since my next thought would be, well, like Marvin Gaye would say, "let's get it on." I don't know, if you do that all the time do you cease dealing with that? Do you see your friends in the same way after you've seen them naked/nearly naked?
I guess I would have a hard time doing that (oops, a pun) without the sex thing being involved. Maybe if you do it on a regular basis it is different?
Thanks for the love Matt...
...btw... ouch... I once stepped on a bunch of thumb tacks when my nieces dropped a boxfull. I
It was an interesting morning.
I think, radar, that the more you see women as people who just happen to be female, rather than a mysterious other that holds the key to your lustful desires, the easier it is to watch them dance naked without getting distracted by the fact that they're dancing naked.
Question: Why is it that among my online aquaintances, a considerably higher percentage of conservative christians make noise about how arousing skimpily-dressed women are? Why are atheist, liberal men better at controlling their lusts?
well, skimpily dressed women are arousing (generally, although of course not always, at least for the first few minutes). ditto men, to some extent. but being in theatre makes the whole nekkidness thing seem pretty blase, as people are naked all the damn time. so i think it is a desensitization thing. like, being on the beach for a while, the amount of skin showing stops being something you even notice, whereas if i were sat in the lab in my bra and panties (whice are probably more coverage than my bikinis) it would attract a lot more attention! (also i would be really cold.)
strip clubs just make me feel sad, though.
Question: Why is it that among my online aquaintances, a considerably higher percentage of conservative christians make noise about how arousing skimpily-dressed women are? Why are atheist, liberal men better at controlling their lusts?
Sorry, I'm with Radar here...I would have a hard time getting the images of my friend out of my head. Stupid hormones...
Well, I LIKE it that way. I want the whole woman mystery thing to keep going, makes marriage that much better I think. Once a naked woman has no effect on me I will be too darned old.
It is easy for me to have women who are friends but none of them take their clothes off around me, either. Har har. My wife would whomp 'em in the head.
Like I said: straight men are entitled assholes.
Hey, if we had a Chippendales type of place here I'd take my women friends for dances too. Unfortunately we don't so the best I can do is food, drinks and listening.
I think on the issue Radar brought up Jake and Joolya hit it dead on. I wouldn't say that I'm around it a lot, since I don't ever work there anymore, but the dancers who are my friends I see as a person rather than a sex object (probably part of the reason we're friends).
I can't speak for all atheists, and I certainly can't speak for conservative Christians, but for me it's easy to control urges that were never discouraged and that I was never sheltered from. Self-exploration and knowledge is a powerful tool. Of course, that could just be me.
Hey, if we had a Chippendales type of place here I'd take my women friends for dances too.
Has it occured to you to think about why there isn't one? Just sayin'
I didn't say no effect, radar. I'm as likely to notice an attractive person as anyone, especially when they're in a situation I find sexy. The difference is I don't let it interfere with talking to them and treating them as if they were real human beings. I don't see it as a "problem".
I'm a little bothered by the generality, though. Would *any* naked woman (or at least any naked woman within certain physical parameters) get you all hot and bothered? Regardless of her personality? Regardless of whether you'd met her? Do you ever think about why that is? Do you ever think that maybe if nakedness weren't so taboo, and so ubersexualised in North America, you wouldn't have this problem? You know it's possible to find your partner very sexy without needing to find all naked members of that sex sexy. Hell, my partner and I see each other naked all the time, and we don't get aroused by it (which is good, because both of us prefers to be naked when we're home, and if we found it as distracting as you seem to, we'd never get anything done) but that doesn't mean we can't find each other sexy in certain situations.
Has it occured to you to think about why there isn't one? Just sayin'
Actually, it has. A couple of places have a male review every once in a while, which is a huge draw, but it seems that adding male dancers permanently doesn't work out the way the places that try hope for. I'm not entirely sure why, but I'd bet that part of it is that guys are "expected" to be raging hormone machines but women are expected to be more refined, as if they aren't people just the same. It's bullshit that it's okay for us dudes to be slobbering horndogs but women can't succumb to base urges.
Basically, your point has been taken, Jake.
Basically, your point has been taken, Jake.
I actually doubt that.
It's bullshit that it's okay for us dudes to be slobbering horndogs but women can't succumb to base urges.
It goes much, much deeper than that, Matt. When you support the sex trade, you condone an industry and a system of attitudes the result of which is the daily torture of millions of women. Even if the particular woman you're patronizing doesn't mind, or even likes her job. Even if the owners of that particular club don't force the dancers into further prostitution, or further abuse the dancers themselves (and despite the fact that these women are your friends, you're not really in a position to know if that's the case. Women tend not to tell people when they're being abused) you're still contributing to the machine that does. The individual level of entitlement required to justify to yourself making someone else be sexual with you or a friend, just because you have more money than her is just the tip of the iceberg, my friend.
You guys misunderstand. I wouldn't be falling all over an acquaintance in that circumstance. It would be a distraction, though. I could likely talk with her as if it didn't mean anything but then I would have the image in my mind of her with clothes off...
Some of you seem to think that being distracted by nudity is the same as being overcome by it. Since I am monogamous and have been so for many years it is safe to say that I can control urges quite well. I am saying that I prefer my nakedness in association with making love. Seems to be better that way. It is for us.
Lastly, I am not being critical of your ability to hang out with naked women and not really "see" the nakedness. It doesn't make you wrong, just different.
I came up with another reason to accept Jesus Christ our Saviour. And it is odd that others do not point this out to atheists (perhaps im the only one tha thought about it):
If you Accept Jesus Christ as our Lord and Saviour, and that he died for our sins. You will go to Heaven when you die.
But if, for the pretext of things, Christianity is "not true", then it does not matter, as we will become worms anyway, right?
Think about it, you have nothing to lose, other then spending time with the Glory of God for eternity.
Isn't that just Pascal's Wager?
"spending time with the Glory of God for eternity"
Or, as David Bryne would put it, "heaven is a place where nothing ever really happens"
Piss off Annie. Believing in myths in order to achieve some ambiguous eternity world of nothing is lazy, ignorant, and pathetic.
Matt, it is really sad to see so many hateful people here (look at previous post), but i wont give up on you.
I decided to make sure you find God, and then i know you will reach many people using your blog, especially the cold hearts of the atheist here. Im not giving up on you Matt, I will pray for you every night.
Annie
Annie, in case you don't remember you can't, nor are you allowed to, "make" people find God. Being pushy about it isn't going to help.
And please don't pray for me. According to the lastest research you might be doing more harm than good...
To get this conversation back on the topic and away from troll-feeding:
I'm a little bothered by the generality, though. Would *any* naked woman (or at least any naked woman within certain physical parameters) get you all hot and bothered? Regardless of her personality? Regardless of whether you'd met her?
No, it would only get me hot and/or bothered if I found the woman attractive. Otherwise, it would just be very distracting.
Do you ever think that maybe if nakedness weren't so taboo, and so ubersexualised in North America, you wouldn't have this problem?
Sure. But being aware of something's effect isn't the same as being immune to said effect. I'm sure if we didn't have a nakedness taboo, then I would not be distracted by naked women (and men, for that matter, but for completely different reasons). But we do, and I am.
You know it's possible to find your partner very sexy without needing to find all naked members of that sex sexy.
Of course. In fact, I find many women not sexy. If they were naked, it would still distract me.
Hell, my partner and I see each other naked all the time, and we don't get aroused by it.
Same here. But if my wife were to be naked in an unexpected situation, I would definitely be distracted by it, if not hot and/or bothered.
Annie, please take the wager you stole from Pascal to the designated troll-feeding zone, and I will be happy to answer it.
You will find Jesus soon Matt, i just know it. :)
You may not Love Jesus, but Jesus Love you !
You know when your alone, feeling sad, and you hear that voice ´I love you´, It is Jesus talking to you Matt. I understand that you ignore it, perhaps because you feel ashamed, and think you will be scoffed by your atheist friends, and you are probably right, but remember, your eternal soul is more important then being popular.
The majority does not always have it "right". Just look at Evolution and the world being "Biiiiiillions of years old", when all evidence show its 6000 years old. They simple ignore facts to get the Evolutionary Religion into the school books.
Jesus Loves You Matt.
Couple of items:
1) Go back to the thread where you belong. Remember that thing I told you when you first showed up here about not shitting on the carpet. You're doing it... and I just had it cleaned. Not nice.
2) If, when I'm alone at night, I hear a voice talking in my head that doesn't belong to me, I somehow doubt that praying will be my first thought. Checking myself in, on the other hand...
3) The popularity thing: why, do you suppose, would this be about popularity when I belong to the most mistrusted religious minority in the country? Hell, if I wanted a bunch of people to pretend to be my friends, I'd go to church.
Matt, God Loves you !
Perhaps your angry at him, or jealous, or afraid, i dont know. But all you have to do, is to admit you are a sinner, and Accept Jesus Christ as your Saviour.
You have nothing to lose Matt, only to gain happiness.
Annie (Jesus Loves You Matt, JLM i will say :P)
A case in point--if I saw Annie naked, I would not get all hot and/or bothered because I know she listens to voices in her head, and that those voices are the only thing standing between her and mass murder. And that kinda scares me.
But, it would be distracting.
Last time, Annie:
The most recent open thread isn't so full that you need to clutter up this one with off-topic comments. Please confine your prosyletizing to that thread.
On the other hand, if you have anything to say about the sex trade, the status of women, the piggishness of men, the supplied links, the merits of working part-time behind a bar or the pleasures of broken glass on bare feet, feel free to chime in.
Please respect my wishes on where to keep your posts. Believe me: I read every comment on this blog, even if you were to bury it in the archive pages somewhere, so I will see what you write even if it's not in the most recent post.
I've been more than fair with you in my requests, and I don't want to ask Janie if I can borrow her marker, so do the right thing and honor my request.
shygetz, thanks for the clarification. I initially interpreted the word "distracting" as being a euphemism for "arousing". It seems that that was wrong, and I'm glad. I, too, would find it distracting for someone to be naked out of context.
Annie:
If you Accept Jesus Christ as our Lord and Saviour, and that he died for our sins. You will go to Heaven when you die.
But if, for the pretext of things, Christianity is "not true", then it does not matter, as we will become worms anyway, right?
Fine, so what if you spend your whole life worshiping Christ, only to die and find out that the Muslims were right and you're going to hell? What do you do then?
oop, sorry matt. We must have cross-posted. I'll stop feeding the troll on this thread.
No problem.
Matt, sorry to see Annie has taken the new tact of starting to pray for you, instead of just spouting creation "science" nonsense. Your patience is admirable. I wonder why she is so fixated on you. Maybe she wants you =P
No, it´s a terrorist tactic. I believe she saw that study showing that praying for someone makes that person ill. She´s attacking!
Does that mean I can call Homeland Security? Do you think they take prayer threats seriously?
Maybe I should make a sidebar graphic with the "prayer request" alert status or something...
Very belated thanks for the link. (Would have replied sooner, but the last few weeks have been extremely hectic for me, and I hadn't really been keeping up on my usual blog-reading (or -writing), so I didn't find out about it till today...)
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